Negotiating with agility<\/p>\n
Negotiating in the real world<\/p>\n
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– Picture the best negotiators you know.\u00a0They are poised, creative,\u00a0and most important, they are agile.\u00a0They don’t lock themselves into simplistic,\u00a0one-size-fits-all approaches.\u00a0Instead, they craft robust strategy to avoid obstacles\u00a0and capitalize on unexpected opportunities.\u00a0Agility drives their success.\u00a0How could it be otherwise?\u00a0Negotiation is a dynamic, fast moving,\u00a0and often uncertain process.\u00a0You need to be ready for all kinds of possibilities.\u00a0The good news is that you can enhance\u00a0your own strategic and tactical skills\u00a0through focused study and honest self-reflection.\u00a0I’m Mike Wheeler.\u00a0I’ve taught negotiation to MBA and executive students\u00a0at the Harvard Business School for 25 years.\u00a0I’m eager to share my ideas with you\u00a0in this LinkedIn Learning course.\u00a0Together we’ll analyze cases and real-life examples.\u00a0Exercises will help you prepare for\u00a0and learn from your own negotiations, large and small.\u00a0You’ll also identify strengths you can build on\u00a0and other areas where improvement will have a big payoff.\u00a0So, join me on this path to becoming\u00a0a more agile negotiator.<\/p>\n
The dance of negotiation<\/p>\n
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– A priority in negotiation from start to finish\u00a0is negotiating how to negotiate.\u00a0That’s not trading offers, and counteroffers,\u00a0or making threats and promises.\u00a0Instead, I’m talking about how parties implicitly define\u00a0the who, what, and how of negotiation.\u00a0It’s a dance that powerfully shapes\u00a0the whole process from start to finish.\u00a0Let me explain the who, what, how framework,\u00a0and show you how to put it to work.\u00a0The who is about engagement.\u00a0Will the parties be friends, or are they going to be foes?\u00a0Is their power equally balanced,\u00a0or is one person up and the other down?\u00a0The what is about framing, how they define the task at hand.\u00a0Is this a zero sum win-lose situation?\u00a0Or are their opportunities for mutual gain?\u00a0Finally, the how is about norming,\u00a0setting the unwritten rules of the game.\u00a0Will they disclose their interests and seek to create value?\u00a0Or will they hide their cards and haggle?\u00a0You can’t decide any of those questions unilaterally.\u00a0Your counterpart’s views about negotiation\u00a0may be very different than your own.\u00a0But you need to influence them\u00a0positively, both their behavior\u00a0and their attitudes to the extent you can.\u00a0Beyond that you’ll have to adapt\u00a0to their approach and make the best of it.\u00a0It’s all ongoing action and reaction.\u00a0And there’s plenty of room for missteps\u00a0and miscommunication along the way.\u00a0If you’re lucky you may ease into a graceful waltz.\u00a0Other times it may feel more like a scorpion’s mating dance.\u00a0You must be ready for either extreme\u00a0and everything in-between.\u00a0Constantly monitoring the interaction,\u00a0recalibrating where necessary,\u00a0is the essence of negotiation agility.\u00a0Here’s a concrete example.\u00a0Imagine you’re trying to nail down a service contract\u00a0with Chris, a prospective customer.\u00a0What’s the first thing you should say\u00a0after she welcomes you to her office?\u00a0That depends on how she begins the conversation.\u00a0Chris might open in different ways,\u00a0each calling for a different response.\u00a0Here’s version one.\u00a0– We’re really looking forward to partnering with you.\u00a0Let’s figure out a deal that works well for both of us.\u00a0– Chris’ partnership comment sets\u00a0a positive tone for your budding relationship.\u00a0If it sounds sincere, echo it.\u00a0But what if she said this instead.\u00a0– Hey, Mike, glad you could come in today.\u00a0So, my colleagues have put you on the shortlist\u00a0of possible providers for this contract.\u00a0– This moves us from the who\u00a0to the what, framing the task at hand.\u00a0Here, Chris is casting you as a bidder in an auction.\u00a0And between the lines she’s telling\u00a0you she’s in the driver seat.\u00a0Don’t jostle over power this early in the conversation.\u00a0But she should know that you have options too.\u00a0Here’s a third possibility.\u00a0– I’m going to be honest with you.\u00a0We like your proposal, but you’re going to have\u00a0to come way down in price to beat the competition,\u00a0or you’re going to lose this deal.\u00a0– That’s a shot across the bow.\u00a0Should you return fire or ignore it?\u00a0Perhaps you could deflect it by saying\u00a0when I explain the quality of our service\u00a0you’ll see we’re ultra competitive.\u00a0Agility requires being deeply engaged\u00a0with your counterpart moment to moment.\u00a0Just as important, though, you need\u00a0the detached perspective of an observer watching\u00a0the back and forth process as it unfolds.\u00a0Maintaining that macro view of the who, what,\u00a0and how of a negotiation is the key\u00a0for getting to where you want to go.<\/p>\n
Ask the right questions<\/p>\n
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– Most negotiators don’t ask enough questions.\u00a0And when they do, they often ask the wrong ones\u00a0in the wrong way.\u00a0Doing it right is simple, ask questions\u00a0that will launch a two-way conversation.\u00a0You might ask about your counterpart’s needs, for example.\u00a0Doing so could open the door to mutually beneficial trades,\u00a0Research shows that question asking also enhances\u00a0the asker’s likeability and effectiveness.\u00a0A real world study of a half a million sales calls\u00a0showed that the top sales people asked\u00a0significantly more questions than average performers.\u00a0These all-stars asked their questions deftly,\u00a0their follow-up queries were tied to whatever\u00a0they’d just heard, signaling that they were\u00a0paying close attention.\u00a0They spaced their questions as well\u00a0so that people wouldn’t feel that they\u00a0So why doesn’t everybody use this simple tool?\u00a0First, some people get stuck in their own head,\u00a0so intent on making their pitch,\u00a0they don’t confirm that what they’re saying\u00a0Then there are others who already think\u00a0they have the answers.\u00a0So why ask?\u00a0Still others are reluctant to ask out of fear\u00a0that listeners will be prompted to respond\u00a0with their own questions.\u00a0But if that happens, great, it means they’re engaged\u00a0and you have a chance to explain where you’re coming from.\u00a0Just make sure that as part of your preparation,\u00a0you’ve crafted good answers to challenging questions\u00a0they may raise.\u00a0Not all questions are created equal of course.\u00a0Avoid asking rhetorical questions,\u00a0asking don’t you agree my offer is fair?\u00a0Paints your counterpart into a corner.\u00a0Instead you might say, how do we figure out\u00a0what would be fair here?\u00a0Note the plural we, wording the question that way\u00a0makes defining fairness a shared task.\u00a0Simple changes in phrasing can make a difference too,\u00a0asking why is your price so high personalizes the issue,\u00a0it invites the justification that could be hard\u00a0Puts the focus on facts that can be analyzed and debated.\u00a0Open-ended questions can expand everyone’s thinking,\u00a0your own, as well as the person you’re negotiating with.\u00a0Asking, is price your major concern takes you down\u00a0one road, asking, what issues do we need to consider\u00a0could take you down another.\u00a0You can even ask questions about questions.\u00a0In a job interview, it’s often smart to ask,\u00a0what else should I have asked about?\u00a0And that’s true whatever side of that table\u00a0you’re sitting on.\u00a0One caveat though, the downside of broad questions\u00a0is that they allow evasion.\u00a0If you need to nail down a commitment,\u00a0you might say, I know you hope to deliver on time,\u00a0will you guarantee it?\u00a0I recommend you have answers on hand\u00a0for difficult questions that you may face.\u00a0Along with that, make a list of questions\u00a0that you want to pose yourself.\u00a0Others will arise during the interaction,\u00a0Others will arise during the interaction,\u00a0but having a list in advance will spur you\u00a0but having a list in advance will spur you\u00a0to ask more often.\u00a0to ask more often.\u00a0You’ll learn more about the matter at hand,\u00a0You’ll learn more about the matter at hand,\u00a0and connect more effectively with your counterpart.\u00a0and connect more effectively with your counterpart.<\/p>\n
How to use improv in negotiation<\/p>\n
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– An MBA student with a glowing resume\u00a0was in his first round of interviews at a consulting firm.\u00a0He demonstrated his technical skills and industry knowledge\u00a0in earlier rounds.\u00a0The final meeting with the senior partner\u00a0seemed like a formality,\u00a0but then the head of the firm asked him,\u00a0“When was the last time you had to think on your feet?”\u00a0It caught the candidate off-guard.\u00a0“Well,” he said, stroking his chin, “let me see.”\u00a0There was a long and awkward silence.\u00a0The guy didn’t get the job.\u00a0Maybe the perfect answer came to you immediately.\u00a0“Oh? About a half a second ago?”\u00a0Congratulations if you had a quick comeback too.\u00a0Of course, it’s easy to be quick-witted\u00a0when nothing is on the line.\u00a0The challenge is being nimble when you’re in the spotlight.\u00a0Yet improv comics deal with the unexpected\u00a0night after night.\u00a0Their secret?\u00a0The “Yes, and” rule.\u00a0They find something to affirm\u00a0in whatever their fellow performer says,\u00a0then they build on it.\u00a0“Yes, and” is a great rule in negotiation as well.\u00a0Let’s say your counterpart tosses out three demands,\u00a0two of which are ridiculous.\u00a0Your natural reaction may be to focus on\u00a0what’s not workable and why.\u00a0The other party may respond in the same spirit\u00a0and tear your arguments apart.\u00a0Down you’ll plunge into a pit of negativity.\u00a0What if instead you picked up on the one thing\u00a0that he or she said that was positive?\u00a0Nourish that idea.\u00a0“Let’s explore that point,” you might say.\u00a0Maybe we can fold it into\u00a0what we were talking about earlier.\u00a0Saying “Yes, and” also can defuse tense moments.\u00a0Here’s an example.\u00a0When Donald Dell was just starting out\u00a0as a sports marketer and agent,\u00a0he represented tennis star Arthur Ashe.\u00a0Dell had worked a lucrative endorsement deal\u00a0with the company that makes Head racquets.\u00a0Later, the company tried to cut back Ashe’s 5% royalty\u00a0on all sales.\u00a0Naturally Dell and Ashe wanted to keep the payments flowing.\u00a0Dell was meeting with Head’s marketing team\u00a0when the door flew open and the chairman stormed in\u00a0and started screaming, “This is outrageous!\u00a0“He’s making 10 times what I’m making,\u00a0“and I’m the chairman of this company.”\u00a0The room went silent.\u00a0Would Dell cave in or blow up the deal by answering in kind?\u00a0Everyone turned to see how he’d respond.\u00a0Now I want you to take a moment and think about\u00a0what you would do if you were in that situation.\u00a0What would you advise Dell to say?\u00a0Well, here’s what happened.\u00a0After a brief pause, Dell tilted his head, smiled and said,\u00a0“But Pierre, Arthur has a much better serve than you do.”\u00a0The tension broke, people laughed,\u00a0and the group got back to business.\u00a0They tweaked the royalty schedule\u00a0and preserved a business relationship\u00a0that was beneficial for both sides.\u00a0Dell later said, “I live for such moments.”\u00a0As an ex-athlete himself, he may have a natural gift\u00a0for performing under pressure.\u00a0For the rest of us, it’s a skill we can practice.\u00a0Try this.\u00a0Next time you’re in a meeting\u00a0and two colleagues are arguing about an issue,\u00a0listen hard for opportunities that they’re missing.\u00a0Try to pick up on positive words or phrases\u00a0that could have prompted a “Yes, and” response.\u00a0Make this a mental habit\u00a0and you’ll amp up your improvising skills.<\/p>\n
Cultivate an agile mindset<\/p>\n
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– An agile mindset is the mark of master negotiators.\u00a0It enables them to shift gears\u00a0and transform possible deadlocks into successful deals.\u00a0Here’s an example of what I mean.\u00a0Early in his career, my friend Jay\u00a0worked for a private investment firm, HS Capital.\u00a0They’d made a smart move buying a cable TV company\u00a0in a small Midwestern city for $8 million.\u00a0Some of that was their own money.\u00a0The rest they borrowed.\u00a0A year later, Jay and his partners decided\u00a0to expand their business.\u00a0They figured they could pay 11 and a half,\u00a0maybe 12 million for the cable system\u00a0in a neighboring town.\u00a0Jay negotiated with its owner for three months\u00a0but got nowhere.\u00a0“Listen,” the guy finally said,\u00a0“you’re not offering nearly enough.\u00a0“If you dumped 15 million on the table in cash,\u00a0“I might take it and I might not.\u00a0“Anything less, you’re wasting my time.”\u00a0Remember, Jay’s maximum was $12 million,\u00a0$3 million less than that.\u00a0If you were in his shoes,\u00a0which of these three options would you choose?\u00a0Offer to split the difference,\u00a0explore creative financing,\u00a0walk away, there’s no room for agreement.\u00a0Think about how you’d save the deal.\u00a0If you have a better idea than those three, that’s fine,\u00a0but be sure it’s specific and practical.\u00a0Okay, let’s look at those options.\u00a0Splitting the difference won’t work.\u00a0Any number between 12 and 15 million\u00a0will be too much for Jay and not enough for the owner.\u00a0Likewise for creative financing.\u00a0A $3 million gap is just too big to paper over.\u00a0So, is walking away the right answer?\u00a0After all, some things just aren’t negotiable.\u00a0That wasn’t the case here, however.\u00a0Five minutes after the owner demanded $15 million,\u00a0he and Jay were shaking hands on a deal.\u00a0So what happened here?\u00a0As Jay was standing up to leave, he asked one question.\u00a0“You think your system is worth 15 million.\u00a0“How much do you think our company is worth?”\u00a0The fellow leaned back and replied,\u00a0“Yours is a little smaller so I’d say\u00a0“14 million or so.”\u00a0In a heartbeat, Jay flipped the negotiation upside down,\u00a0becoming the seller instead of the buyer.\u00a0After a little haggling,\u00a0the other party agreed to buy Jay’s system\u00a0for $14 and a half million.\u00a0Jay went into the negotiation well prepared\u00a0with a clear objective.\u00a0But when it became obvious\u00a0that the owner wouldn’t budge on price,\u00a0Jay didn’t try to beat him down,\u00a0nor did he cave on his own assessment\u00a0of the other company’s value.\u00a0Most people, including Jay’s counterpart\u00a0sitting across the table,\u00a0would have seen the $3 million gap\u00a0as an insurmountable obstacle.\u00a0But as an agile negotiator,\u00a0Jay recognized it as an opportunity\u00a0to make an even better deal.\u00a0In a mere 18 months, he more than doubled\u00a0his firm’s original investment.\u00a0Having a plan is important when you negotiate,\u00a0but don’t let the plan have you.\u00a0Before you walk away from the bargaining table,\u00a0look hard at what’s blocking agreement.\u00a0Like Jay, you might find the seeds\u00a0of an even better deal.<\/p>\n
What to do before you negotiate<\/p>\n
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– Before starting a negotiation,\u00a0think hard about these two questions.\u00a0Is now the right time?\u00a0Is there a downside?\u00a0Let’s start by taking a look at timing.\u00a0For small negotiations, timing may not matter much.\u00a0But even for common transactions like buying a car,\u00a0analyze whether your leverage will get better or worse\u00a0based on when you negotiate.\u00a0Is your counterpart hungry to close a deal right now?\u00a0If it’s the beginning of the month\u00a0and you’re car shopping, you’d often be better off\u00a0a few weeks later.\u00a0That’s when dealerships are under pressure\u00a0to meet their quotas.\u00a0Other opportunities may be fleeting.\u00a0Say that you love a house\u00a0that the owner is about to sell privately.\u00a0Making a preemptive offer might be smart\u00a0before other people bid up the price.\u00a0Always assess whether you might face competition.\u00a0Waiting and seeing is sometimes wise,\u00a0but your general tendency in negotiations\u00a0should be to press ahead.\u00a0That’s often true even when important facts\u00a0may still seem hazy.\u00a0Think about it this way.\u00a0Hesitating to take action is wise\u00a0only if one or more of the following things is true.\u00a0Waiting is costless.\u00a0That is, all your options will remain open\u00a0and you won’t lose credibility.\u00a0You’re confident that time is on your side\u00a0and your options will improve.\u00a0Or there are specific reasons\u00a0why gaining more information will make you more effective.\u00a0Finally, if sleeping on the decision\u00a0will make you more comfortable with your choice.\u00a0But the less true that one or more of those factors is,\u00a0the more likely it’s time\u00a0to take a deep breath and move ahead.\u00a0Now for the other item on your pre-negotiation checklist.\u00a0Is there a downside risk?\u00a0No harm in asking is the premise\u00a0of the classic book, You Can Negotiate Anything.\u00a0For example, look how much easier it’s gotten\u00a0for consumers to bargain for discounts\u00a0shopping in stores or online.\u00a0But sometimes negotiating can backfire badly,\u00a0especially when relationships are involved.\u00a0My friend Arvin learned this lesson the hard way.\u00a0He was close to an older couple\u00a0who lived in a spectacular mansion\u00a0with sweeping ocean views.\u00a0When they decided to downsize,\u00a0they offered it to Arvin for 2.5 million.\u00a0This was well below market price,\u00a0but Arvin countered with 2.25 million.\u00a0You probably know where I’m headed.\u00a0The couple responded angrily.\u00a0“We treated you like a son and this is how you thank us?”\u00a0They withdrew their offer, found a broker,\u00a0and sold the place for $11 million.\u00a0Woops.\u00a0Arvin has done fine in other negotiations\u00a0and can now laugh about this one,\u00a0but his experience remains exhibit A\u00a0for the proposition that you can never know\u00a0how far you can push a negotiation\u00a0until you’ve pushed it too far.\u00a0When someone makes you a great offer,\u00a0instead of haggling, maybe you should just extend your hand,\u00a0smile, and say, “Thank you.”<\/p>\n
How to set your baseline<\/p>\n
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– There’s so much uncertainty in negotiation,\u00a0but the one thing that you can\u00a0and must know cold are your own priorities and trade-offs.\u00a0To craft a strategy, start by setting your baseline.\u00a0Most people do this poorly, if they do it at all.\u00a0Following these simple steps gives you an important edge.\u00a0One, identify your provisional walkaway,\u00a0the minimum that you’d be willing to accept.\u00a0Two, construct alternative packages of equivalent value.\u00a0Three, anticipate how your interests might change.\u00a0The first step,\u00a0establishing your walkaway, is negotiation 101.\u00a0That means identifying a deal\u00a0that overall leaves you no better,\u00a0no worse than you’d be if there were no agreement.\u00a0For example, imagine a job offer that might lure you away\u00a0from your present organization.\u00a0Then picture a specific package that would put you\u00a0on the knife edge between accepting or rejecting it.\u00a0Naturally, you’d want to be offered something\u00a0much better than that, but here,\u00a0we’re trying to establish the lowest that you’d go.\u00a0That’s just a start.\u00a0Step two prompts you to weigh your trade-offs.\u00a0Now think of another compensation package\u00a0with the same total value.\u00a0How much salary would you give up, for example,\u00a0in return for more stock options or a better benefit plan,\u00a0a little bit or a lot?\u00a0Questions like that aren’t easy.\u00a0They make most people squirm,\u00a0but it’s far better to wrestle with them\u00a0as you’re preparing for negotiation\u00a0instead of making snap decisions in the heat of the moment.\u00a0Now push yourself further.\u00a0Think of a third package, again,\u00a0of equivalent value to the first one.\u00a0Would you trim your salary requirements\u00a0if the company were to give you more flex time?\u00a0Would you increase your salary demand\u00a0if the job requires more travel than you prefer?\u00a0These three hypothetical packages define points\u00a0on the baseline,\u00a0the boundary between saying yes or no.\u00a0It’s built on what you know and feel today.\u00a0Now, consider as the last step how that line might shift\u00a0as your interests change.\u00a0You’ll probably learn some new things\u00a0in the course of negotiation.\u00a0It would be odd, in fact, if you don’t.\u00a0Circumstances might change, as well.\u00a0What if, for example, you’re dealing with the other company,\u00a0and your present employer gives you a promotion\u00a0and raises your pay?\u00a0Your baseline surely would go up.\u00a0Then again, other conditions might lower it.\u00a0Assessing best and worst case scenarios\u00a0will make you more agile.\u00a0Doing this homework in advance pays off many times over.\u00a0It lets you focus on the negotiation process\u00a0while you’re in the middle of it.\u00a0It will give you discipline and confidence,\u00a0and research shows that the exercise will make\u00a0you more creative when you’re at the table.\u00a0Think back to your most recent negotiation.\u00a0What could you have done to open up your thinking\u00a0and creativity?\u00a0Look ahead to your next one.\u00a0How would you use these tips to become more agile?<\/p>\n
Determine your negotiation profile<\/p>\n
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– Honing your negotiation skills is a lifelong endeavor.\u00a0Building on your strengths\u00a0and addressing areas for improvement pays off handsomely.\u00a0It will ask you to rate yourself honestly,\u00a0on four essential negotiation skills.\u00a0You’ll have a total of 16 points to allocate,\u00a0giving one to seven points to each skill.\u00a0There are no right or wrong answers\u00a0and your responses will generate a personalized profile.\u00a0Maybe you said you were equally good or bad at all four.\u00a0But of the thousands of people\u00a0who have completed this exercise,\u00a0very few people give themselves all fours across the board.\u00a0Two of the questions dealt\u00a0with the substantive dimension of what you’re negotiating.\u00a0Namely, opportunities to create value\u00a0and getting the maximum possible.\u00a0The other two are about the relational dimension,\u00a0asserting your interests and understanding other parties.\u00a0Both dimensions go to the heart of negotiation\u00a0and the two are tightly connected.\u00a0Your responses likely show that.\u00a0But overall patterns are different\u00a0for different kinds of negotiators.\u00a0You can see that simply by plotting the results,\u00a0which is the next part of the exercise.\u00a0The vertical line is substantive, problem solving.\u00a0Value creation is at the top\u00a0and value capture at the bottom.\u00a0The horizontal line is the relational dimension,\u00a0with self-assertion on the left\u00a0and understanding others, empathy, on the right.\u00a0People’s self-assessments fall into five different clusters.\u00a0For example, those who rate themselves strong,\u00a0in regard to empathy,\u00a0almost always feel that they are good value creators too.\u00a0That makes sense.\u00a0If you understand other people’s interests,\u00a0you should be able to make constructive trades.\u00a0So call them empathetic value creators.\u00a0This is the most common group.\u00a0If this is your profile, you’re certainly not alone.\u00a0But most people you’ll deal with, 70% in fact,\u00a0fall into one of the other four categories.\u00a0So don’t make the mistake of assuming\u00a0that everyone else negotiates the way that you do.\u00a0For example, look at this second profile.\u00a0These are people who rate themselves\u00a0as relatively strong at self-advocacy.\u00a0No surprise, they’re also confident\u00a0about capturing an ample slice of the pie.\u00a0But note that they judge themselves\u00a0as less skilled at empathy and value creation.\u00a0Perhaps they believe\u00a0that’s the price they pay for being assertive.\u00a0They’re the assertive value claimers.\u00a0The analysis portion of the exercise\u00a0describes the other three common profiles.\u00a0No matter which of those most closely fits you,\u00a0recognizing other different styles\u00a0is important to negotiation success.\u00a0Depending on whom you’re dealing with\u00a0and the situation at hand,\u00a0tap your agility and tweak your own approach to match it.\u00a0Your profile also serves as a template\u00a0for further learning and improvement.\u00a0Ask a friend or colleague who has seen you negotiate\u00a0to assess your relative skills.\u00a0They may tell you\u00a0that you’re too self-critical in some respects\u00a0or maybe that you’ve overlooked\u00a0some areas where you could do better.\u00a0Enhancing each of the four basic negotiation skills\u00a0will enhance your overall performance.\u00a0But give special attention to the ones\u00a0where there is the greatest room for improvement.<\/p>\n
Manage the negotiator\u2019s dilemma<\/p>\n
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– Here’s some good news, you can have your cake\u00a0and eat it too, at least that’s true in negotiation.\u00a0It may not seem that way, many people feel\u00a0that negotiation puts them between a rock and a hard place.\u00a0If they follow the cooperative path,\u00a0they risk being exploited,\u00a0and if they play hard ball instead,\u00a0they may jeopardize relationships.\u00a0In my field, this is called the Negotiator’s Dilemma.\u00a0It’s the supposed tension between cooperating and competing.\u00a0It’s a false dichotomy, I just don’t buy it,\u00a0and research backs me up.\u00a0There’s a third avenue that lets you have it both ways.\u00a0Studies show that you can collaborate with a counterpart\u00a0to create value while also securing\u00a0a handsome portion for yourself.\u00a0Experimenters paired up subjects\u00a0for a multi-issue negotiation.\u00a0Most people reached agreement,\u00a0though some created and captured more value than did others.\u00a0That’s to be expected, but here’s the twist.\u00a0In addition to collecting results,\u00a0the researchers asked subjects to secretly rate\u00a0how they felt about their counterpart.\u00a0Responses varied from strongly negative\u00a0to strongly positive.\u00a0The goal was seeing whether there’s\u00a0inevitable trade-off between getting\u00a0a superior deal and having a collaborative relationship.\u00a0There was not.\u00a0The data was plotted with substantive terms,\u00a0price and terms, on a vertical scale\u00a0and relational success on the horizontal axis.\u00a0Negotiations found four distinct buckets.\u00a0Yes, some people did well on one measure\u00a0and poorly on the other, these are the people\u00a0in the boxes in the upper left and lower right.\u00a0That seems to support the dilemma concept.\u00a0But look at the box in the upper right.\u00a0These are negotiators who got great deals,\u00a0but were also highly rated relationally.\u00a0They got the lion’s share yet still\u00a0were liked by people who ended up with a smaller portion.\u00a0What’s their secret?\u00a0They recognized that the health of relationships\u00a0with counterparts is not driven by what you\u00a0obtain for yourself or how much they end up getting.\u00a0Instead, it’s primarily shaped by how you negotiate,\u00a0specifically how you engage and connect with others.\u00a0I’ve included an exercise to help you build\u00a0a personalized checklist of dos and don’ts\u00a0so that you can have the same double barrel success.\u00a0The exercise files asked you to compare and contrast\u00a0two experiences, one where the negotiation relationship\u00a0was positive, the other where it was negative,\u00a0so you can learn from those experiences.\u00a0Others who’ve responded to these questions\u00a0speak positively about counterparts\u00a0who seem genuine and engaged.\u00a0The well-liked negotiators asked questions\u00a0and listened intently.\u00a0They had credible reasons for what they could and\u00a0could not do, they’re focused on solving a problem,\u00a0not trouncing the other person.\u00a0The negotiators at the negative end\u00a0of the relational scale are just the opposite.\u00a0They come across as self-centered,\u00a0they’re often aggressive and treat negotiation\u00a0as a game of bluffing and intimidation.\u00a0Even if you ultimately succeed in getting\u00a0reasonable terms from such people,\u00a0resentments can linger long after the process is over.\u00a0Just look at the fourth box on the lower left,\u00a0these are negotiators who got mediocre\u00a0or worse results, but who still managed\u00a0to alienate the other party.\u00a0This is not where you want to be.\u00a0So, I’ve asked you what kind of negotiator\u00a0you prefer dealing with.\u00a0Now my question is what kind of negotiator\u00a0do you want to be?\u00a0Being a decent person is an end in itself,\u00a0and there’s strong evidence that there’s a bonus.\u00a0Being open and engaged can help you\u00a0both create and capture more value.<\/p>\n
Align your tactics and strategy<\/p>\n
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– When people ask me about negotiation,\u00a0it’s often about things like\u00a0is making the first offer really a mistake?\u00a0Does negotiating on my own turf give me an edge?\u00a0What about outnumbering the other side?\u00a0My typical response is it depends.\u00a0I’m not ducking such questions,\u00a0but the right answer depends on your larger objective.\u00a0Strategy should always drive tactics,\u00a0not the other way around.\u00a0It’s here where many people go astray.\u00a0They focus on what they could do or say moment to moment\u00a0without judging whether those pieces\u00a0comprise a coherent approach.\u00a0Tactics that might be needed in a contentious dispute\u00a0could actually sabotage an attempt to create a partnership.\u00a0Sticks judiciously deployed might help in the first case.\u00a0The second case likely calls for carrots instead.\u00a0So strategy and tactics must be aligned.\u00a0Then there’s another problem.\u00a0People may mean well,\u00a0but their behavior isn’t always consistent with their ideas.\u00a0Researchers asked subjects whether they’d cooperate\u00a0or compete in the classic prisoner’s dilemma game.\u00a0It’s a two person decision-making exercise.\u00a0If both parties cooperate, each wins an equal share.\u00a0But if you cooperate and I compete, then I win everything.\u00a0After hearing the rules,\u00a0the vast majority say they’d act cooperatively\u00a0to create mutual gain,\u00a0but when they play the game for real,\u00a0almost half decide to be competitive instead.\u00a0Two factors are at work.\u00a0First, it’s costless to be virtuous in theory,\u00a0but when real money’s on the line,\u00a0self-interest comes into the equation.\u00a0But it’s deeper than that.\u00a0When it’s time to play the game or engage in a negotiation,\u00a0one’s focus shifts to how the other party will behave.\u00a0The bigger the fear that the other party will use sticks\u00a0and try to dominate, the stronger is the impulse\u00a0to find a stick to defend yourself.\u00a0That fear also can lead to other scenarios,\u00a0like concealing your priorities or issuing an ultimatum.\u00a0These things can go downhill very quickly,\u00a0as each party reads and reacts\u00a0to the actions of the other one.\u00a0It’s a matter of projection.\u00a0Imagining the worst case makes the worst case happen.\u00a0The good news is that this is not inevitable,\u00a0not by a long shot.\u00a0A friend of mine says, “Tactics speak louder than words.”\u00a0Tactics can either provoke competition\u00a0or elicit cooperation.\u00a0For example, you might have good reason\u00a0to want to schedule the negotiation in your office,\u00a0but your counterpart could see that\u00a0as an attempt to dominate.\u00a0An offer instead to go to their place to talk\u00a0could be received as a gesture of goodwill and respect.\u00a0If you’re curious about what your tactics say\u00a0about your own negotiation style,\u00a0you can download the Exercise File and find out more.\u00a0Remember, always make sure your actions are consistent\u00a0with your intentions.<\/p>\n
Next steps<\/p>\n
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– Congratulations on completing this course.\u00a0Being agile strategically and quick on your feet\u00a0moment to moment is essential to negotiation success.\u00a0It can turn deadlocks into deals\u00a0and good deals into great ones.\u00a0I hope you’ve already had a chance to employ\u00a0concepts and techniques we’ve covered here.\u00a0If not I hope you can do so very soon.\u00a0I also hope you continue to polish your skills.\u00a0We’d love to see you in one of our on campus\u00a0executive courses at the Harvard Business School\u00a0or if travel is an issue check out my negotiation\u00a0mastery course on our distance learning platform.\u00a0I’ve also included an exercise file\u00a0full of additional resources for you.\u00a0Most of all I urge you to reflect on\u00a0and learn from your own negotiation experience.\u00a0Exercises provided here will help you do that.\u00a0My negotiation 360 app for iOS\u00a0and Android devices takes this further\u00a0with prompts to assess your style,\u00a0prepare well, conduct after action reviews,\u00a0and compile a personalized library\u00a0of your own best practices, good luck and thank you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Negotiating with agility Negotiating in the real world Selecting transcript lines in this section will navigate to timestamp in the video – Picture the best negotiators you know.\u00a0They are poised, creative,\u00a0and most important, they are agile.\u00a0They don’t lock themselves into simplistic,\u00a0one-size-fits-all approaches.\u00a0Instead, they craft robust strategy to avoid obstacles\u00a0and capitalize on unexpected opportunities.\u00a0Agility drives their […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[10],"class_list":["post-78907","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-research-paper-writing","tag-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/78907","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=78907"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/78907\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=78907"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=78907"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/papersspot.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=78907"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}