Mediator Skills Discussion
Instructions: Follow the procedure of emotional paraphrasing in the book and interpret the disputant’s speech when using the emotional paraphrase technique. Then, write a reframe for each. See example below:
Disputant’s comment: “This neighborhood is becoming a mess. My neighbor is such a pig. I can hardly control myself when he leaves that trash all over his front year after one of his drunken parties”.
A student may paraphrase as: “You think he is messy” or “You wish he were neater.” However, emotional paraphrases are about the person making the statement rather than one person’s thoughts about the other person.
A better emotional paraphrase is: “You feel disappointed”.
A good reframe that changes or neutralizes the disputant’s negative words is: So, “You’d like a neat neighborhood”.
Write an emotional paraphrase and reframe for each comment below:
#1 Mediator’s Question: “What is a good neighbor?”
Disputant’s Comment: “Well, to be a good neighbor, I think you have to have respect for those around you. Maybe not just tell someone [said with sarcasm] ‘You’ll think about it.’”
#2 Mediator’s Question: “What brought you to mediation?”
Disputant’s Comment: “I’ve had enough with this degenerate’s loud parties that go on all night every weekend.”
#3 Mediator’s Question: “Where are your houses located in relationship to each other?”
Disputant’s Comment: “Way too close!!”
#4 Disputant’s Comment: “She really let the group down on this project. We all hoped that she would come through with her portion of the assignment, but it never happened.”
Watch the video below and report two examples when the mediator reframed what the disputants said in the mediation session.
#5 Video Example of Reframing
#6 Video Example of Reframing